My Word of the Year
For the last several years, many of my friends have posted on social media to share their words of the year. Admittedly, I have always been intrigued but have never done this. It just didn’t feel authentic for me. Instead, as a recovering type A, I would make lists of goals and action steps. However, as I continue to walk through my yoga teacher training journey and study yoga philosophy, I have felt myself connecting more deeply to the notion of a word of the year.
On New Year’s day, I got to participate in a Yoga Mala practice led by my yoga teacher training teacher, Tish Hilyer. This practice consisted of 108 sun salutes, which sounds really intimidating, but she broke the practice into four sections and each section contained modified versions of the sun salute. The four sections of the practice were based on the four aims of life from Hindu philosophy. To sum these four aims up quickly they are: livelihood, pleasure, purpose, and liberation. For me, these four aims also relate to the concepts from the Yamas and Niyamas, the ethical practices of yoga. The Yamas instruct us to live kindly and honestly without stealing, excessiveness, or possessiveness. The Niyamas instruct us to seek purity, contentment, self-discipline, self-study, and surrender. Each time we began another round of sun salutes, we would rest in child’s pose as Tish guided us to through a meditation on an aim of life. With each aim, she asked a series of questions to help nudge us towards an intention aligned with that aim. As the sweat fell off of me with each lunge and chaturanga, I heard the same word coming through for me over and over again: connection, connection, connection.
Each aim of life and each Yama and Niyama comes down to connection. To truly be non-harming, I have to dig deep and connect with my friends, family, and community in order to hear and meet their needs. To truly be non-stealing, I have to slow down because everytime I’m distracted or hurried I’m stealing time or robbing someone of a good experience. To live with self-discipline and self-study requires that I connect with self-worth and voice. To live with contentment, I have to feel a deep connection to the moment and to myself because when I can slow down and feel connected to the present then everything becomes just right just as it is.
This idea of connection has already started to bear fruit as I find myself just two months away from being a registered yoga teacher. On the evening of New Year’s Day, Tish texted me to ask if I would be interested in subbing a class the next morning at the yoga studio. My younger self would have said no. I wouldn’t have been connected to my self-worth. However, as I have moved through this training, I have felt a deep well of self-worth. Self-worth should not be confused with pride or arrogance. Pride separates us; self-worth connects. It’s the knowledge that every single one of us is worthy of good things. And as I connected to that feeling during the Mala practice and the rest of New Year’s day, I knew I had to say yes to subbing. It was scary to know that the class would be crowded and full of students I hadn’t met before, but I also felt connected and held by a community of like-minded people who believed in me. I put all of my effort into the class and tried not to attach myself to the outcome. When class was over, I had that same sweaty and exhilarated feeling that I had the day before leaving the Mala practice.
I know that there will be times this year where I lose connection to myself, my family, my community, and to the moment. Life happens, and I’m human. Like everyone, I’m prone to losing my temper or distracting myself. However, my hope is that with the theme of connection guiding me this year, those moments will become less and less and that I can rebound from them with grace and ease.