YTT Weekend Four and Five Reflection

At the end of September, my family and I went to the beach for a week. It was the first week of fall break for my son, and I had just come off the fourth weekend of YTT. It was perfect timing and the perfect way for us to reconnect as a family. My parents and brother joined us for the trip, so we rented a large house on the beach, so that everyone could be comfortable.

One of my favorite features of the house were the two large decks it boasted that offered perfect oceanfront views. One of the decks was right next to my room, and every morning, I would wake up early, drink a cup of coffee, and take my mat to the deck. Usually, it was still dark when I started my practice. The stars sparkled and the waves crashed. Then purple would slowly break through, then light pink, and then bright pink. It was beautiful to watch the transition from night to day. 

One morning I went out to the deck and the waves crashed hard against the shore. They crashed with ferocity. I was surprised. Just the day before the sea had been gentle, so gentle that we had all bobbed in the waves enjoying the ocean's subtle rocking. But, it was not so subtle that morning. Something had shifted overnight.

When I looked out at the ocean, though, I knew that I was only seeing a small part of it. Somewhere, the ocean was calm and still. Somewhere, there was a part of the ocean that's so deep and unchanging. The ocean may get rocky on the surface, but that stillness is always there.

We, too, are like that. In yogic philosophy, there's the idea of the koshas, which are written about in the Vedas. The koshas are layers to the physical and subtle body. According to the Vedas, there are five koshas. These layers are separate, but they're also connected. At the core of our being, is anandamayakosha. This is the bliss layer. It's the still, small part of ourselves where we feel at peace. No matter what's going on on the outside whether we're happy, irritated, sad, or anxious, this layer of us exists and is unchanging. The work is finding a way to connect with this subtle layer.

How many of us walk around feeling disconnected from this part of ourselves? We're overstimulated, overworked and overtired. We're out of tune with our physical bodies let alone these subtle layers. But just as the stillness always exists in the ocean, the stillness always resides in us. Yoga and meditation are ways we can connect with ourselves and to all the layers of our being. 

I just finished up the fifth weekend of YTT. I’m over halfway finished with the program now, and I feel an immense gratitude to the practice and for these training weekends. It’s exciting to dive in and learn more, and I’m looking forward to beginning my seva (service) project in November, which will be sharing free, community classes. It’s a little scary to take on this challenge while still completing the training, but just as I’m always a little fearful when I first tiptoe into the ocean, I know that once I push past my fear, that I’ll be really thankful and glad I did.